Friday, May 4, 2012
Home at Last
Well, we have been home almost 6 full days now. I feel it is going a little better than expected. Not that it is easy. The transition is still hard on the kids (and on mom and dad). Sometimes one of them will start crying out of the blue. Big big tears. They are grieving. Emery will not accept any comfort during these moments. She sits in her favorite chair and rocks back and forth really hard. At least the chair has a soft back! If she hurts herself accidentally, she will also try to comfor herself by rocking. If Blake is crying he will just lay on the floor and cry and become very agitated. After about 10 minutes or so, he will come to mom or dad to be held. Blake also has full blown major tantrums. These tantrums are set off when he is told no. He is not having them as often as last week. But at least once or twice a day, he has a kicking, screaming fit. The psychologist at are agency, told us we have to enforce rules but we cannot show any anger. That is really tough. This kid is very persistent. When he does something wrong, we tell him no and try to get him interested in something else (which almost never works). If he does it again, we give him a choice of obeying or sitting on the couch with mom or dad. Most of the time he ends up on the couch, which he absolutely hates. He will get down and head right back to do whatever it was we told him no about again. Then we must carry him back to the couch and explain the choices again. Now this little guy does not give in easily. Yesterday, one of these episodes lasted 45 minutes. I think he eventually just wore himself out. We have found that if there is something he likes doing, and we tell him he will not be able to do it unless he makes a good choice, he sometimes complies. He loves watching Mickey Mouse. So if Mickey is on during one of that tantrums, we tell him we will turn the tv off. This has worked once. He loves going anywhere, especially to school to pick up his sisters and cousins. If it close to pick up time, and we tell him he cannot go if he chooses to disobey, he normally will make the right choice. Both kids will hit themselves when they become really agitated. They do not do it very hard, but it is still difficult to see because you know they are so frustrated and they are grieving and they just need to get the anger out. They had their initial pediatrician check up on Tuesday and had their blood work completed today. Blake will be seeing an orthopedic specialist in about 4 weeks for his leg issue. Both kids will have various assessments about mid summer to determine where and when we should begin school and any needed therapy. Other than the rocking and tantrum episodes, the kids are generally happy. They love to have us chase them around the house and they giggle and giggle. They love playing on the swing set out back and really had fun at the park yesterday. They both play fairly well on their own at various times throughout the day. Blake is beginning to enjoy reading books and doing puzzles with mom. I have numerous pictures around the house of the twins and of our first trip to meet them. Both kids will spend several minutes at a time looking at the pictures. I am so glad I already had them up! They both eat well and Emery now weighs the same as her brother. She was 4 pounds lighter than him. She now even has a little belly on her! She still stuffs a lot of food in her mouth at a time. Trying to gently work on this with her. She most likely does it because she is afraid her plate will be taken away before she is finished. As she begins to feel more secure and understands that she will always have food, this will improve. Blake is using more And more English words. He is also beginning to understand some of what we say. Today, after he put on his jacket to go away with dad, he said "ready daddy". So we are hanging in there and taking it step by step. Cannot wait to see how things are after another few weeks!